AS someone who has a cancer patient in the family I think this is very good advice.
A good friend of mine suggested that “the next time I go to church I am going to wear a t-shirt that says, ‘Please don’t ask how I’m doing.”
I sympathize. At the same time, “how are you” is near the top of the queue of phrases that come out of my mouth.
In July, as part of our Summer Book Club, we read Will Schwalbe’s The End of Your Life Book Club. In it, Schwalbe tells how he learned that sometimes a more appropriate question to begin with is “Do you want me to ask you how you are doing?”
Sure, this makes perfect sense when, like Schwalbe, you are attempting to be considerate to someone you know is slowly dying of terminal cancer. But what about someone suffering from something that isn’t so obvious? You can’t know. But most of us care enough that we don’t intend…
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