The key is simple: make your decision ahead if time.
Sounds impossible. How can I know how to decide before I know what is asked? Life is full of opportunities for bad decisions. You can be sure that the devil will send to you the wrong woman or the wrong man to marry. Make up your mind ahead of time that you are not going to be fooled. A potential spouse must meet some standards. Put it down on paper. Remember love can be ginned up quite falsely (called lust) or whatever. The person who thinks through a major decision will end up with a better outcome.
Make up your mind that you won’t compromise with evil before the opportunity comes to you. I was offered a pile of money and endorsements when I ran for the Legislature. I sad “no.” I was nice about it. The offer was generous. This group expected me to follow their corrupt, immoral doctrines when I was in the Legislature. I said no ahead of time. I did not win the election but I was nobody’s “yes” woman either. The only lobby you have to answer to is the God Lobby; God is more than competent to tell you how to vote.
If you know ahead of time what you believe and why decisions are easier
That group that wants to drive to the beach when you know perfectly well you will not be able to make an important assignment, or you have a required job situation? Say no ahead of time. My daughter was in a car with a clearly drunk driver with his wife in the front seat telling her to shut up about his drunkenness. She opened the door saying, my parents told me if I was ever in the car with a drunk “Get out and walk.” Which she did. She is alive today. That man is now dead, by the way.
Being fired may be a blessing
There are bad bosses and bad jobs. When a job comes your way, find out about the company. My friend Jack worked for a Fortune 500 company which insisted on drunken parties for management with prostitutes. He quit. If you can’t change the company, you don’t need to make yourself a part of that.
God has many jobs out there. That is especially true for actresses and actors. There will an invitation to do porn. Make up your mind now to turn it down. It will go on your record then decent producers and talent agents will know up front your quality and you may not ever get a good role.
No decisions based solely on money is a good one
Don’t marry for money. You will pay for it for the rest of your life. Think twice about marrying someone who has been divorced several times. He/she may be hard to live with. I remember one Methodist minister who had 4 wives. My boss was upset that I refused to go to church where he was a minister. I said, and I believe it now 30 years later, that if for no other reason, he could be condemned for having bad judgment.
There are women who don’t want to admit that are fat and they buy a dress 2 sizes too small. And then they must take it back. Does this make sense? Same with a much married person. Personally I have seen that people who marry often usually think it is all someone else’s fault. If this is you, please change yourself before you try to change someone else.
Find good role models
When I worked at a juvenile prison I learned about parents so horrid I felt they should be in jail not their sons. If you are living in that kind of world, read biographies of famous people to see how they handled decisions. Yes, some of life is luck, but you will be surprised to learn that the more solid a person is the more lucky he is as well.
Your character is yours alone
Character is what will shape your life, and that can be decided ahead of time. I include some biographies that may interest you. The best biographer I know is Eric Metaxas, both adult and children’s books. I also enjoyed biographies of Ben Carson, the famous black doctor raised by an illiterate mother, and Harry Truman, the President who decided to use the Atomic Bomb.
#religion #spirituality #making decisions #characterdevelopment